:: The Thug Life ::

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:: Wednesday, January 26, 2005 ::

Well here I am again. I'm bored out of my mind since I'm currently not working and am stuck at home. I know I've made promises before about bringing back The Thug Life (not that any of you care) so today I will make no such promises. For all I know this could be my final post for another year. Anyways 2004 has been over for awhile now and so far 2005 hasn't been so great. I've had back surgery, the Steelers magnificent season fell just one game short of the big one, Bush won the election (well I guess that was 2004 but it's still pretty bad) and I haven't made a dime yet. Anyways for starters here's my top ten movies of 2004.

10. The Incredibles
9. Napoleon Dynamite
8. Team America: World Police
7. Shaun of the Dead
6. Farenheit 9/11
5. Collateral
4. Garden State
3. Kill Bill Vol. 2
2. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
1. The Passion of the Christ

Honorable Mentions: Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgandy, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, Dawn of the Dead, Saw, Spider-Man 2, and National Treasure. Nah I'm just kidding that movie sucked.

Worst movie of the year: Super Size Me. Thanks for getting rid of the super size fries you moron. If I wanna eat super size fries then I'll eat super size fries I don't need some idiot with a camera and a grudge to decide what I'm going to eat. And fat people need to quit suing McDonalds. Use the money you're spending on court fees and lawyers for a gym membership you overweight piece of lard. Or maybe don't eat McDonalds. It's not like they put a gun to your head.

The Steelers: Bill Cowher. How do you make that call? Down by 14 points on the New England 2 yard line. It's fourth down. You have the number 2 rushing offense in the league. Momentum is on your side and you're going to kick a field goal??? Good God man what were you thinking. That gave the game away right there. Kicking a field goal accomplished nothing. You'd still have to score twice. Even if you don't make it you pin NE on their own 2 yard line. Maybe if you're lucky you could even get a safety. But no. I don't care how many times they turned the ball over if you're coach doesn't have any nards when the game is on the line then it's over. I never thought I'd say this but Bill Cowher is a wuss. The man may look like Sgt. Slaughter but apparently it's all an act. I can't talk about this anymore. Not yet at least.

The Back: It's ok. I just wish it would hurry up and heal so we could get working on Drake Savage. Therapy's been nice. I have aquatics therapy so there's always a good chance I'll get to see an old man's butt in the locker room. Nice.

Requiem for a Dream: I just watched this for the first time yesterday and wow. If you haven't seen it, do it. This should be standard for every high school kid in America to watch. If you're really interested the Director's Cut DVD is on sale at Best Buy for $7.49 through the week.

President Bush: I heard on the news the other day that Bush said he would no longer push for an amendment to ban gay marriage. Duped Christians, I submit further evidence that you were used.

Super Bowl: Prediction- Eagles 35, Patriots 21. Man I hope the Pats lose horribly.

24: It still rocks.

Lastly, I would like to discuss comic books. Astonishing X-Men and The New Avengers are two books that I'm getting really into right now. Also there's a good storyline going on in Wolverine's book right now, "Enemy of the State". For those of you not to worried about geekiness I'd suggest checking them out.

Until next time this has been this time. Brown over and out. Thug on.
"You take a chance getting up in the morning, crossing the street, or sticking your face in a fan."

:: Justin 2:28 PM [+] ::
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The following things everyone should like. If you don't, you're a moron.

1. Caitlin. Hey, you knew it was comin.
2. Hulk Hogan
3. Arnold Schwarzenegger
4. Wolverine
5. 24
6. The Terminator movies
7. Sausagefest Films
8. Old Cartoons (Thundercats, Transformers, Masters of the Universe, G.I. Joe, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ghostbusters, X-Men, etc.)
9. Quentin Tarantino movies
10. Christian Bale
11. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974), Hellraiser, and Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
12. The nWo
13. The Pittsburgh Steelers
14. The Alien movies (only 1-3, and only the "assembly cut" of 3)
15. Saturday Night Live
16. The Simpsons and Family Guy
17. Slashers (Nightmare, Friday, Halloween, Phantasm only)
18. Goodwill
19. The Dead Movies (Night, Dawn, Day including both remakes) and The Evil Dead series and 28 Days Later...
20. Toxic. Yeah, the Britney Spears song.
NOTE: These are not the only things that people should be forced to like but just a short list.

These are things you should NOT like. If you do, you're a moron.
1. Caney McCanerson
2. The Rock
3. Sylvester Stallone
4. Cyclops
5. E.R.
6. The Cyborg movies
7. New Line Cinema and Warner Brothers for those crappy DVD cases.
8. George Lucas movies
9. New Cartoons. All anime included but particularly Pokemon and Digimon.
10. Ashton Kutcher
11. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
12. De-Generation X
13. The Cleveland Browns
14. The Star Wars movies (all of them)
15. Kids in the Hall
16. Daria
17. Teen Slashers (Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Valentine, etc.)
18. Kohls and K-Mart
19. The Return of the Living Dead series (except for Part 2 which made me laugh a lot)
20. All Britney Spears songs except Toxic
NOTE: These are not the only things that people should be forced NOT to like but only a short list.

Until next time, this has been this time. Thug on. Brown over and out.
"That's like saying The Bible is just a book."
"Yeah, and I'm sure Jesus was just a guy."
:: Justin 5:55 PM [+] ::
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Well maybe no one else will say it but I will. Brough backed down like a freakin vagina in his blog. Sorry for jumping to conclusions? Sorry for not knowing all the facts? PFFFFFFFF. I figure if our President can jump to conclusions and start blowing countries to crap for no reason (weapons of mass destruction?) I can go on a little rant in my good for nothing blog. And if you don't like it or you think it's "F'ing offensive" THEN DON'T FREAKIN READ IT. I didn't force you to come here and I didn't force you to read this. And if you hate me for having an opinion on a matter then geez I guess I'll pull a Brough and apologize for having a belief. Don't harass me about it because I don't want to hear it. Did I go over the top a little bit? Maybe. I won't deny it. But then I guess if good ole Bush can then why not me? This whole thing is just so so so stupid. He's upset because we're making a movie with the same title whether he's going to sue or not, he's upset about it and threatening us about it even if it's unintentionally. It's like elementary school playground crap. GET OVER IT. If there were money or even a huge instance of pride involved I could understand. But in this case there's neither. So in conclusion, so no one gets their panties in a twist we'll change the freakin title a little bit. I'd hate to think someone was losing sleep over this. Until next time this has been this time. Thug on. Brown over and out.

"Life is one big game of craps, and the devil is playing with loaded dice"
:: Justin 9:58 PM [+] ::
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"Pretending you're not a thief doesn't make it so."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Apparently the creator of the crappy Hobo Ninja who I have discussed in recent posts and I shall from now on refer to as Jack Tard thinks Sausagefest has stolen something from him. Please tell me what it is. His story? No it can't be that because even our crapfest of a story is better than a spoof of video games (must I reiterate, The Big Boss). Since Mr. Tard's story is basically the only thing he's come up with himself I guess we haven't stolen anything from him. If you would bother to do any research the phrase "Hobo Ninja" has been around long before you or Sausagefest decided to make a movie with that same title. My suggestion is that instead of staying in this weekend and watching gay porn all alone while coming up with more stupid movie ideas you should go out and meet some real people. Pretending you're a victim doesn't make it so. Until next time this has been this time. Thug on. Brown over and out.

Oh crap I guess I can't say "Thug on" since Ja Rule said that before me so he obviously created it. I'd hate for him to pop a cap in me. Shucks.
:: Justin 10:28 AM [+] ::
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Hello once again faithful readers. Today I'd like to discuss a few things first off, atheists. There was a girl at work today who was wearing a shirt that said "wash your hands after touching Christians". How wonderful is that? Now I'd like to make a note that 99.9% of the people I work with are atheists or don't care about God. I've worked there for a over a year now and really haven't said much about any of this but today I just couldn't take it. Whenever reading or talking to athiests one thing they despise is making sweeping generalizations about atheism. Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't that shirt a sweeping generalization of Christians? I imagine this girl met two or three Christians who were absolute holier than thou a-holes (who probably weren't real Christians in the first place) and thought, "wow doesn't this shirt describe what you should do after touching every Christian?" Doesn't this just show how ignorant every single atheist alive is? Sarcasm aside, something I find intriguing is the fact that so many atheists find the idea of the existence of a god (not even the Christian God but any god) to be absolutely revolting. Why is this? Well when you boil it down it comes down to arrogance. Atheists (and people in general) are very very prideful. I imagine the thinking of an atheist who first hears about a God and that He's in control goes something like this, "What? You mean I'm not the center of the universe??? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" My advice is this, grow up people. You wanna pretend that the evolution theory doesn't have so many holes in it that it could be mistaken for swiss cheese, fine. You wanna pretend that if you don't believe in God then you aren't subject to His judgment, that's fine too. Just remember that you can't make something not true just by believing it isn't.
Next I want to talk about bumper stickers. Ugh. Just the thought of them nausiate me. Now I realize that there's always a point to bumper stickers but the bottom line is this, if you want to argue a point, perhaps you should consider another avenue besides bumper stickers. They're freakin annoying and I'm about 100% positive that they aren't going to change anyone's mind. "Oh my gosh. Did you see that bumper sticker? I'm never gonna buy foreign products again!" PLEASE!!! So all you feminists, hillbillies, idiots with a lame senes of humor, and holier than thou folks can you please rid your car of those stupid things before someone laughs at one and the apocalypse occurs.
Lastly, dude who's mad at Sausagefest for "stealing" Hobo Ninja. Ross tells me that he recieved a letter in the mail the other day from this guy asking us to "cease production". I think I speak on behalf of all of us here at Sausagefest when I say, SHOVE IT! THE REAL HOBO NINJA WILL LIVE!!! Now there's a bumper sticker for ya.
Until next time this has been this time. Thug on. Brown over and out.

"we must never be apart"
:: Justin 10:34 AM [+] ::
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I'm surprised I remembered how to get into this thing. I'm not making any promises here but I'm going to try and restart The Thug Life to its former glory. No, that does not mean I will post every stinkin day again but I will try to post somewhat regularly. Before I get into some rants I'd just like to update you a little bit on me in case you haven't been following, as this may be your only connection to my life. I'm still dating the absolutely lovely Caitlin Welch. I'm still not in school. I still work at Molten, a factory in Bowling Green. I still live at home. I still help out with two youth groups. I still participate with Sausagefest Films. I still am obsessed with movies, X-Men, G.I. Joe, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Hulk Hogan, and The Pittsburgh Steelers. Here are some topics I'd like to discuss:
1. The Academy Awards. Nine times out of ten these awards are total crap. This year was no exception. LOTR (high up in the runnings for the most overrated movies ever, right next to Star Wars) wins ELEVEN awards?!?!?!?! That's just plain outrageous. A travesty. I hope eventually people realize just how average these movies are. There were only about two movies I'd seen and liked up for awards and that was my own stupid fault. I'd like to see Mystic River, 21 Grams, and Lost in Translation. As it was, I was happy to see Charlize Theron win for Monster as that was a pretty good movie. Despite the fact that it was absolutely NOTHING like what actually happened.
2. "The Passion of the Christ". This was a really really really really good movie. Yes I'm Christian. So yes I'm biased. However take a look at the acting and cinematography and tell me that this was not a wonderfully shot movie. Despite the fact that it didn't follow the Gospels exactly it was pretty accurate.
3. "Hobo Ninja". I would at this time like to address someone. I don't know what his name is but his screenname is Dover Demon in case you'd like to master his butt. Said person is quite upset that good ol Sausagefest is creating its own epic masterpiece, "Hobo Ninja". This is because said person has already made a movie entitled "Hobo Ninja". Now let's look past the fact that his movie is only like 15 minutes long and is a spoof of video games (his main bad guy is named The Big Boss), he claims that the story for our movie is and I quote a "bastardization" of his original movie. PLEASE. Anything would be better than a video game spoof. Besides I'm sure his movie sucks. Just like I'm sure our "Hobo Ninja" will suck (albeit a bit more entertaining I'm sure). Neither movie will make anyone famous or make anyone money. However said person must be delusional because he has went ahead and paid 75 bucks to get "Hobo Ninja" copyrighted and swears to have a lawyer ready to sue us in case we use "Hobo Ninja". Well I guess that's it. It's all said and done. We may as well just pack up shop and head on home. He's got it copyrighted. He's got a lawyer. Better look out. Sorry dood but 1. we won't be making any money off of it so it doesn't matter and 2. our stories are so totally different that no one would confuse your crap for our crap. My personal opinion, you should get a life that involves more substantial things than 15 minute movies. Really it's ok. You can still have a real life and make movies. It works for Sausagefest.
4. Bdoff's Happy Fun Gay Times Returns. Bravo to Brian Brough. He keeps the good times a rollin. I thoroughly enjoy the return and look forward to future posts. I suggest you check out the old blog and I'll be adding a link to his new blog shortly.
5. Jody Madaras. Mr. Madaras is back to help with the Eastwood High School Musical. HOORAY we have someone who had a bit part on a Broadway play or something here to help with our High School Musical. He can teach us everything we'll need to know to become huge failures in showbiz. Thanks Mr. Madaras! However he fails to see it this way. He thinks he is God's gift to acting. He's trying to turn everyone involved in the musical into little acting Nazis. He thinks the people that are in pit band and track should do their workouts in the morning and skip track practice after school to have pit band practice after shool. His reasoning? Because the musical is coming up in 2 weeks and track is not. Well guess what bud? The first track meet is in 3 weeks. What hypocritical rhetoric. You want to stress these guys out even more by getting them up earlier and doing their workouts in the morning? He claims that the musical should at this time be everyone's number one priority. This is laughable. Here's a message to everyone with the ability to read, if at any point in your life a high school musical is the most important thing to you then maybe you should reconsider your priorities or do the world a favor and jump off a bridge or live on some uninhabited island where you won't infect anyone with your boredom. I would like to point out that I am in no way associated with this year's musical as I graduated in 2002 however my girlfriend is a member of the pit band (she wasn't even going to be in the musical this year so Mr. Madaras should be thanking her for joining as she's one of the few people that is actually doing what they're supposed to) and I felt I should let some people know just how much a jacktard this dood really is.
6. It appears as though maybe I should get a life other than ranting in some weblog. There I said it first.
Well I'm pretty tired of typing now. In case you're wondering, yes I'm home from work. I'm sick. Anyways I'll be back the next time I feel like ranting about something. Until next time this has been this time. Brown over and out. Thug on.

"Has anything you've ever done made your life any better?"
:: Justin 5:41 AM [+] ::
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Week 10

Shiffert 8-5 (Green Bay 50 pts.)
Justin 7-6 (Philadelphia 42 pts.)
James 7-6
Brough 7-6
Beezer 6-7
A.J. 6-7
Bryn 6-7
Jeremy 5-8

:: Justin 10:49 AM [+] ::
...